Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Sleep Like A Baby

The next person who uses this phrase is going to have the joy of experiencing my semi-psychotic cackling first hand.  Honestly, anyone using that phrase has NEVER had the joy of having a baby.  

Newborns need to feed from either breast or bottle about every three hours, this does not change no matter the time of day for adults.  For this reason, and many others, you will notice sleep deprivation being a common link between all parents of very young children.  Let me explain is easier terms here...

Thanks to random images on Facebook for this one.

Babies know when you are attempting to sleep.  Young children wait until the exact moment when you have completely relaxed and faded into that first level of dreaming where you are caught between conscious and blissful nothing.  As your breathing slows, your muscles finally drop tension, and you stop processing thoughts clearly, that is when they strike... screaming like their hair is on fire and the world is ending.

It seems that post birth, the saying should be "sleep like a husband".  So many of my friends have said it seems like their men can sleep through anything, and now that our boy is older I agree.

I actually got very lucky.  On those early nights with our newborn it was hubby who gave him the night-time feeding while I sat hooked to the machine in the next room because even with the battery our pump model was so loud it could wake the dead.  It was only after our boy was in his own room all night and only waking once that he suddenly gained the ability to sleep through anything.

Sleeping like a baby seems to only happen in fairytales and movies.  I'm convinced that "sleeping through the night" is a myth too, but we all have our quirks.  The one with my boys (the tiny and adult sized one) seems to be only sleeping when I am awake.  Cool trick, really.

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